Remember when I was talking about goals a few weeks ago? And I said that my dance goal was to be the best dancer I could be?
But to be fair, I didn’t realize I was lying. Well, I knew it when I wrote that, but I hadn’t realized it for the three years prior to that.
Still with me? Good.
You see, I sat down with my teacher shortly after the holidays. I wanted to talk about our goals, mainly to make sure we were on the same page but also to understand where he’s coming from in terms of teaching. I never second-guess him, I completely trust him, but sometimes I just need to understand why we’re doing what we’re doing.
And he said that he had finally figured it out: In putting together all the things I have said over the years, what he thought I was saying was not that I wanted to be the best dancer I could be, but to be the best dancer. Period.
My reaction when he said that? A huge internal recoil. No, no, no, I can’t possibly have meant that!
Hmm, where did that recoil come from? It took me a while (and some professional help) to figure it out. And I won’t bore you with all that.
But in the end…he’s right.
Damn. I hate it when he’s right.
Now, “the best dancer” is really unattainable. You will never NEVER be the best at everything every day all the time in dance. Everyone has off days. And even if you don’t have an off day, you may have a judge that is just looking for something different than how you dance.
So I had to adjust the goal in my head a bit to make it reachable. Reword it, really.
But at the end of the day?
Yep, I want to be the best dancer. THE BEST ONE.
And I’ll tell you…embracing this (or at least not recoiling on it) has changed how I’m learning in lessons. Even before the conversation, my teacher had changed how he teaches me a bit too because of his interpretation of the goal. And my progress has been HUGE. And now it’s an upward spiral…my lessons are going well, I’m learning a lot, so I’m motivated to do homework, which makes my lessons better etc etc etc.
And it’s FANTASTIC. And makes me so happy.