Guest post: How to believe

2 Mar

A few weeks ago, I wrote a post asking how do you start to believe in yourself where there isn’t empirical evidence to validate your belief. Around the same time, my friend Sarah over at SarahOnTheGo wrote a post on achieving a positive mental attitude. (I reposted that on my blog here.)

Anyway, it really made me wonder what Sarah’s take on the whole belief thing would be. So I asked her to write a guest post for me on that topic. Here is her fabulous post.

Believing in yourself always proves harder than it seems. Our coaches, coworkers, bosses, friends, family, classmates and teammates will always be the first to throw their hand up for a high-five: congratulating, admiring and encouraging the good work to continue. It feels good to be recognized for our accomplishments.

But at times there hangs that looming cloud of doubt. Negative phrases like, “I could have done better” or, “I did it all wrong” rattle your brain and poke a hole in silver lining of your happiest cloud until it rains all over the positivity of your achievement. We are always our biggest critics; we analyze every step of our work – work we have dedicated ourselves to for years. Why is it so hard to believe the congratulatory remarks, cheers and pats on the back?  Well, it is hard because we always want better for ourselves and unfortunately sometimes overlook the fact that the better for ourselves was the best it gets.

After reading The Reinvented Lass’ blog post, “How Do You Believe?”, I realized that this issue is a sensitive one. I firmly believe that finding the inner strength to stay motivated and optimistic is hard. We all have at least one thing we are really good at, and for this blogger, dancing is her niche. She is told by others that she is excellent, and even her teacher acknowledges her skill, so what makes it hard for Cathy to believe in her potential? “Believing in myself is a very difficult thing for me. I can intellectually tell you all the things I’m good at, but I struggle emotionally to believe what I’m saying.”

This is a common theme among the non-believers. We are able to recognize our talents, because of spectators and teachers, family and friends, but there is an emptiness behind the confidence; and that is what it all comes down to: confidence. There needs to be a certain level of ego involved in what you do. It is most certainly hard to accept that letting a little bit of cockiness into your down-to-earth demeanor is necessary, but I have learned that with it you will be a better believer; stronger at whatever it is you do.

My girlfriend and I always channel our inner divas when the time calls for it. We joke around about being the best at this and that. She is a fashionista and wears heals in her sleep. People stare, but she keeps strutting. Her mentality? I know my outfit is awesome, and I am going to let you know that. Her attitude is not in your face, it does not push people away. She is warming and charming. A dash of vanity, when applied appropriately, is contagious. People can sense a strong, assertive female from a mile away.

I do the same with my writing. Even though I am still in college working on a journalism degree, and at times (most of the time) I am lacking in correct formats, grammar, punctuation – what have you, I tell myself that my writing is good and that I am doing something great with my free time by using the internet as a platform to inform and entertain.

Although we are not talking runway shows or hosting blog sites, the same applies to dancing. If Cathy takes the praises of the people around her and uses it as a positive energy in her next routines, she will not only nail her steps yet again, but there will be a glow to her: an infectious and powerful confidence that will resonate within her for a long time.

It is about having the right attitude. Believing in yourself is always a struggle because we compare ourselves to others; we overanalyze the little bits and pieces of work that were actually already pretty damn impressive.

Cathy, you need to talk to yourself sometimes. Tell yourself that you are the best at what you do and you know this because you put in the time and energy to be the best. Get a little cocky, it is all right! Smile throughout your dance routine. Appreciate the art you are engaging in, that some people could not being to fathom doing for themselves.

Break out that Positive Mental Attitude that I believe in so whole-heartedly, address your fears, and break down walls. Life’s emotions are struggles and battles within ourselves, but there is no time like now to put on your best face and take on whatever it is you’re doing with sass and confidence.

About Sarah:
When the overworked ideas and opinions regarding every day life became too much for her to keep bundled in her head, she decided to let them pour out onto this blog for the pleasure of the world to see.

Her name is Sarah Mastroni and she is a 24-year old writer and college student from Southern Connecticut. Her daily and long-term goals are not limited to learning the art in varied lifestyles, but also staying happy and unbound by the constraints of stress and expectation. The main constant in her life is that inspiration never ceases to pass her by. She is affected by something everyday; driven to learn more about people through universal mediums of raw self-expression such as music, food, conversation and fashion.

Her concept of travel is that of most young people with little cash and a hunger for the world. While she enjoys turbulent flights and going through Customs as much as the next person, she oftentimes prefers to explore great semi-local destinations. A spontaneous road trip with friends can heal, just as a great planned dinner with great company does. On the cusp of New York City and two hours from Boston, her little New England home is the perfect epicenter for weekend getaways up the coast to New Hampshire or down to the beach in New Jersey – eating and drinking too much the entire time.

sarah On The Go is intended to let her clear her overworked Cerebral Cortex, inform and entertain by using the knowledge she gathers from exploring outside these four walls to give you a taste of the beauty she discovers.

3 Responses to “Guest post: How to believe”

  1. sarah On The Go March 3, 2012 at 8:52 am #

    Reblogged this on sarah On The Go.

  2. thegentlehome March 6, 2012 at 10:13 am #

    Always a good topic 🙂 Believing in ourselves is often hard…and it is important to have a good mental opinion of yourself, although I have a little different perspective on the issue! I think we are able to believe in ourselves when we see ourselves not from other’s perspectives and not from our own, but from God’s. He made us…perfectly, wonderfully and fearfully the Bible says. The Bible is truth above all else. It is true above our opinions and feelings about ourselves. So when we feel down and don’t agree that we’re as glorious of a creation as our Father meant us to be, we can simply ignore that feeling or thought, or say “get outta here negativity!” because it doesn’t line up with what God says about us. That’s what it means to “take every thought captive.” And above all of that, I think what we often need more than anything else…is not to believe in ourselves at all but to wholly put our belief in Jesus. As counter intuitive as that sounds, when we take our eyes off of ourselves, that is when we truly have that positive attitude we are searching for. Great topic!


  1. Weekly roundup « The Reinvented Lass - March 5, 2012

    […] my friend Sarah at Sarah On The Go to write a guest post on believing in yourself. I love what she […]

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